Two Things You Should Know About My Feet

First, I ALWAYS have silver toenails, even in the dead of winter when I am wearing two pairs of socks. Even when I'm on vacation. And even when I'm in the hospital for a colonoscopy. The only exception is when I wipe the old polish off to apply the new. I have 10 bottles of silver polish. One is the correct color (which has, of course, been discontinued) and the others are Emergency Backup Polishes, purchased when I had gone astray without the correct bottle. I have not yet had to use any of the Emergency Backup Polishes on a regular basis, but my last bottle of correct polish is getting kinda lumpy. It's been a while since it was discontinued. It is my fond hope that it will be New and Exciting again soon; and like leg warmers or platform shoes it will come back around before my last bottle solidifies.

Also, I am NEVER without my toe rings. You know how some people go on vacays and get tattoos to commemorate them? Usually because of too many margaritas? Well, for a period of time, I commemorated with toe rings. Not those cheap, adjustable ones with dolphins and rhinestones. Oh, no. I was drawn to heavy, hammered and twisted sterling silver numbers. Fitted, and requiring some Vaseline (Registered Trademark) to slide over the fleshy toe tops. My mother has been known to wear bangles in a stack up to her elbows. I guess that's why I developed the notion that toe rings should be piled on. And I ended up - eventually - with 3 on each, um, pointer toe?

Yes, I sleep in them. No, they don't hurt. No, my toes don't turn green. I don't notice them when I wear shoes, they don't rip through pantyhose. And they have been there for years and years and years.

(If I'm ever in a disaster, the fam doesn't have to look at the whole body for a positive ID. Just toes.)

So, last weekend hubby and I were sitting on the swimming pool steps after dinner. And he asked, "What is that silver thing on the bottom of the pool?" And the jewelry designer in me, who just loves to find random silver things to recycle into other things, looked down and remarked, "It looks like sterling silver! The same kind of pattern as my top right toe ring!" I was feeling pretty lucky, to score some silver. For a moment there...

Uh oh. No top toe ring on the right foot.

And the middle ring on the right foot is just a bit wiggly. Which is why I decided on the top ring to hold it in place. And now the top ring is...broken.

And we had no plans to go anywhere awesome that has sized and fitted toe rings; and the right side middle ring was surely going to fall off. I was suddenly very sad.

A cursory investigation of the broken toe ring confirmed what I suspected. It was fit for the meltdown pile, but not much else.

The next day, I searched the Web for a size 3 1/4 toe ring; plain hammered silver. No luck...lots of size 3s, which hurt; and size 4s, which I might as well just give away without wearing them. Because they are gonna fall off immediately upon toe placement.

That toe ring had been with me through a whole bunch of thick and thin. As had the toe ring beneath it; which was now unprotected and vulnerable. I was sad just thinking about it. I thought about booking a trip to Key West, where I got my first ring, but it is hotter than the grate over hell in the summer. And who would take care of the dogs while I was gone?

I considered clipping them all off. Brave New World without toe rings! But I quickly realized that I need them for ID in case of disaster; along with my silver toenails.

Ultimately, I decided to let nature take its course. If Toe Ring Number Two on the right foot was going to fall off, so be it. I slept soundly for the first night since the gruesome discovery of the bent and broken ring on the floor of the pool.

I was adjusting to the idea of 5 toe rings instead of 6; and facing the possibility of losing one more of the five. I was strong, and I was OK. I would survive.

Then, a whisper..."Nancy...?"

I took a deep breath, and listened:

"Uh, Nancy?" That darned voice in my head again...

"Don't you MAKE silver jewelry? You could make a toe ring. Size 3 1/4."



D'oh!

Why didn't I think of that?

Why?

I've been making jewelry for quite a few years. It is what I do most of my waking hours. Yet it rarely makes news here.

A couple of days ago, I decided to apply to the Metal Entanglements Market at 1000 Markets. 1000 Markets is a juried site, and the Metal Entanglements Market is juried, as well - you have to pass muster to get in. There is a test.

And the first question is, Why? Why do you make jewelry out of metal wire?

Why? For me, the easy answer is "Why not?" But I didn't think that would pass muster.

I thought about it. For a looooong time. No one had ever asked me "Why?" before. Including me. I didn't really KNOW why. So I began to work backwards; with "how" I found myself working in the medium. Hoping I would get to "why."

This is where I ended up:

Ooh, scary question, kinda like introducing myself at a 12-step meeting. {{Deep Breath}} OK. It started with paper clips. I was always the kid who fiddled with paper clips. My mother, as artistic as she was, didn't appreciate that all the paper clips were turned into non-clippy flowers. But I couldn't stop myself...

And, it turned out when I got there, Corporate America was pretty unimpressed, as well. (BTW, Corporate America also has no tolerance for memos folded into paper airplanes before being placed on the recipient's desk.)

Clearly, the only solution was for me to part ways with Corporate America, and open my own business. Where I was FREE TO BE ME!!!

Unfortunately, my Paper Clip Habit was eating into my bottom line.

Then, a flash! An AHA Moment! Dare I say, a miracle? Or perhaps it was merely the voices in my head, chattering a little louder than usual...there are metals more beautiful than paper clips! (Please don't get me wrong, paper clips are beautiful in their own special ways.) I could bend beautiful wires into fun and functional stuff, and make all my Christmas presents at the same time! Because, really, no one wants a paper clip flower for Christmas. And I could do it at my office, while I talked on the phone, and I wouldn't bend any more paper clips! Who doesn't love a win-win situation?

So I went to the Jewelers' supply house in town. Met my good friends Austin and Rolf. (Names have been changed to protect the innocent.) Pestered them incessantly...I mean, asked politely (a lot)...about the properties of different wires, and what would happen if I sanded this wire and threw it into Liver of Sulfur, and what that gizmo does, and could they sharpen this cutter for me...and pretty soon they just started giving me copies of jewelry mags to keep me busy and out of their hair (and probably also to cause me to have more ideas so I would buy more things.)

That was a long time ago. Since then, I retired from office work, and now bend and hammer and stretch and coerce wire (and a few other media) into adornments; for sale at shows, shops, and via the Internet. I am still amazed and fascinated by the infinite possibilities of wire. The highlights and lowlights of oxidization. The delicate whisper of texture when I wrap a chunky, hammered 12 gauge bracelet in smooth, round 24 gauge wire.

In a lot of ways, I'm still that little girl bending paper clips. Thank you. {{Sits down.}}

Is this "Why"? I don't know. But I passed muster.

Give Me a Hand!

I make jewelry. My jewelry is handmade by my own two hands (and sometimes a foot or an elbow for stability's sake, but they have no place in this story and I'm getting sidetracked as usual.) Because my jewelry is handmade, it is unique. Even if I try to make the exact same thing I just made, it will be a little different the second time.

I sell my jewelry here at Etsy - a site for artists who make things by hand. This serves as a disclaimer. Everyone who comes to Etsy to shop knows (or can read, in big, bold letters) that Etsy is a marketplace for handmade. People shop at Etsy to find things one-of-a-kind, or a bit off the beaten path (sometimes all the way over the cliff) or anti-department store, if they are feeling particularly negative.

"By hand" is good. But, pardon the intended pun, the hand stuff has gotten a little (come on, you knew it was coming) out of hand.

For example. Every restaurant worth its fleur-de-sel in a teeny tiny dish that you (and anyone else who has had the dish before you, or will have it after you) access via fingers has a "Hand-Cut Prime Rib," likely served with "Hand-Cut Steak Fries."

Now, A) I have no idea why fries are only for steak. I don't eat steak, and I like fries, so I think they are losing a large demographic of potential buyers suggesting that you can only get the fries if you get a steak. I mean, lots of people like a side of fries with, say, pizza. And besides, prime rib is not a steak, so why do the prime rib people get fries? And B) Could someone explain to me why on EARTH I would want anyone to touch my prime rib? If I ate prime rib, which I don't. But, does hand-cutting make the prime rib unique? Or is it a disclaimer so that people know that the sizes of the cuts of prime rib vary wildly, and they can't complain to the waitron (is that the PC term? Or is it "waitperson?") that his slice is bigger than your slice. The server can point (with a flourish) to the description on the menu and simply say, "Look, honey; you were warned. The Prime Rib is HAND-CUT. If you think you can do it better, have at it. The carver's parole restrictions limit his knife to 3 1/2 inches...I'd like to see you make anything but a mess with that. Oh, by the way. I gave you the smaller piece because, honey, you could really stand to lose about 20 pounds."

And another thing. Hand-ground meat at the grocery store. Why would I spend hard earned money on it (if I ate it, which I don't) when all those butchers are missing fingers?

Two blocks away we have the Touchless Hands-Free carwash, competing with the Hand-Detailed Carwash with Fancy Coffee Cafe. How to choose?

Hand-breaded fried chicken. It's OK at Mama's house, but not so appetizing at KFC.

Yesterday I saw a drive-thru offering "Hand-Spun Milkshakes." What do they do, juggle them? And what are they going to do with their milkshake machine now? I'll bet it broke, and they told the burger-flippers that their job description now includes juggling. Come to think of it, that place is represented by a clown. Clowns juggle. Savvy marketing ploy, no? Wish I could have been in on the Executive Strategy Marketing Initiative Leadership Media Relations Brand-Globalizing Council Meeting for that idea.

Yeah, I'm a hands-on kind girl, but I am definitely hands-off my food. Indifferent about the carwash thing.

Oh, and if you plan to move a king-sized Tempurpedic mattress (along with about 4 bazillion tons of other stuff) from a fourth-floor condo down a freight elevator and into a 16-foot rental truck that stands about 5 feet off the ground, be sure the lift gate works before you drive it off the rental lot. Just saying.

ArtMart! May 3rd! 11 AM to 5 PM!!!

Sketchworks Theatre
3041 North Decatur Road
Scottdale, GA 30079
(Scottdale is just a little suburb of Decatur. If you're in Atlanta you don't need to pack a lunch and drive a billboard-ridden highway to get there.)

We have been planning for months. We have made our rain arrangements. The grass will be mowed Friday. The Vendors are mostly Etsians, like me. (Etsy is another planet. About 4 light years from the moon. People there just make stuff all day long, and sell it. But we are happy, we Artsy Craftsy Types. No worries about gas prices or presidential candidate meltdowns. No Global Warming or Recycling Issues. We can make everything into something else on Planet Etsy, and we are happy.)

I would like to tell you about some of the May 3rd participants, because I am in awe.

Sewphisticate is one of my very first friends from Planet Etsy. I am enamored of her work because

a) she makes chainmaille keyrings, which impress 20-something sons and nephews who are often very difficult to shop for; and,

b)her husband has a FORGE. Can you imagine how much fun a FORGE could be???? I can.

Graceful Babies is coming from NY(!) to participate; gotta love piratewear and argyles for the wee ones.

LeAnn Christian and Studio Marcy can make glass do their bidding!! Lampwork is fascinating. Each little piece is its own little world. I want to do this. In the worst way...I want to take pieces of glass and FIRE and combine the two to create ART. I want to shriek "It's MELTING!" like the Wicked Witch of the West! I loved Wicked, didn't you? Oh, I'm sorry. Where was I?

Jinkywink has invitations, announcements and paper things to adore.

Sugarplumdelights, your source for finger puppets, burp cloths and tutus! Tutus! Who doesn't need a tutu? My dance group will be drooling. (Of course, some of us are prone to drool anyway...) We LOVE tutus.

Knotty Sheep makes jewelry using Chinese knotting techniques. I've been to China, but I didn't see such corded prettiness there.


Adripratt knits and crochets all manner of wearables and home goods, many from organic materials (soy yarn? who knew?)

And the drama of TSI Photography. Images to make you think! People, animals, nature; amazing.

Oh. The Kitties are poking my legs as I type. They want me to mention that I will have THEIR creations, their very own frillz art-to-wear, at the show, also. The Kitties, unfortunately, will not be able to join us because their rabies shots are not up-to-date. I told them over and over to take care of that little chore; but they kept claiming to be "too busy" (yeah, right. Chasing sunbeams and worrying my vintage crystal beads is "busy?" How about lying around in the laundry?) Upshot (ha, an unintended but clever pun!) being, they can't get an appointment for their shots until next week, so they have to miss the ArtMart.

Also, as a special added attraction, The Ladies of Dancin' Dynamics (yes, the ones who covet tutus...how "ladylike" is that, really?) are hosting a Bake Sale! We are proud to offer The Secret Recipe University Inn Granola, among other deliciousness.

And what brought this show on, you might ask? Or not, but I will tell you. It's one part Local Artist Showcase, one part Thank You to Sketchworks Theatre because Dancin' Dynamics just looooves our Sketchworks friends, and belonging to The Theatre Scene; and the rest is "Why not? Sounds like fun, and everyone benefits!"

Please come join us! Meet some incredible artists! You might even brush shoulders with Very Famous Actors. The Very Famous Actors might even consent to photo ops...for a small fee.